Hauntedween 1991 Review
Directed by: Doug Robertson
Starring: Brien Blakely, Blake Pickett, Michael Schwitzgebel
Review by Luisito Joaquín González
The nineties certainly didn’t begin with a bang for the slasher genre, which was to be expected after its prolific population of horror cinema throughout the previous decade. Censorship restrictions and an extreme lack of originality meant that the category had become a dumping ground for low-budget and low-quality independent movies, which had lost the allure that made them so popular in the first place. It is widely considered that the last glory year was 1988, which saw the dying breath of the cycle unleash fairly intriguing titles like: Maniac Cop, Intruder, Evil Dead Trap and Edge of the Axe. From then on it was a downward spiral into mediocrity as throwaways like Zipperface and Live Girls put the final nails in the coffin. Hauntedween was another feature from the ‘lost years’ – a term that describes the gap between 1988 and the Scream rebirth in 1996.
If you check on the web, you will find a lot of sites related to Hauntedween and most of them praise the flick as if it were the slasher equivalent of Citizen Kane. Closer inspection however shows that the majority of these positive comments are from the local vicinity of where the feature was made because it has a somewhat legendary status there. Almost all of the actors were picked up from West Kentucky University and the producers held casting days in the town centre. Many residents were given parts as extras and local businesses got involved with the marketing. Rumour has it that still to this day, Kentucky families sit around a table on Halloween eve and watch the film back whilst celebrating their involvement in the ‘Kentucky Godfather’. – Ok so I made up the last bit, but you get the idea…
It also seems however that the featured inhabitants of this particular district seem to be incredibly vocal all over the world wide web. So much so that I once called the film ‘mediocre but strangely alluring’ on another website and was inundated with messages of how I was unfair and that the disapproving things that I had said were inaccurate. The movie was, apparently, everything but ‘mediocre’. I once again noticed that these people were either in the movie or were related to someone that was.
Unfortunately, I don’t know anyone from Kentucky and have only ever visited the fried chicken namesake, so I will call the movie as I see it. I obviously respect that this is a huge achievement for those involved, but I am here to share my views of slasher flicks with people that enjoy them and my views will always be my own. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s fantastic that this feature has become a cult favourite and that it has such a loyal fan base. Even more so because it’s a slasher movie and I love that the genre is getting that kind of appreciation. I don’t have the bias however of being a local lad, so forgive me if I don’t give it a five star review…
In the prologue the camera heads along a country road that leads to a haunted house. There’s a young child at the gate collecting the entrance fee from revellers that all comment on his Halloween mask. Eddie Burber looks like a great prospect to become a junior serial slasher, mainly because he doesn’t speak too much and as we all know REAL bogeymen are inexplicably muted. The point is proved when he enters the house of horror and chases a young girl until she ends up impaled on a bizarrely misplaced spike. Accidents do happen, but that can’t be the excuse for young Eddie. He confirms his murderous intent by finishing the job with a huge machete that he conjured from thin air. He escapes the scene of the crime and heads back home to his mother who informs him that they’re going to have to go away for a while.
Twenty years down the line, we bump into the fully-grown Eddie and his mum living at a secluded ranch. Whilst chopping some firewood with a huge axe that I presume will play a part later in the feature, his mother drops to the floor, seemingly suffering from a coronary arrest. The still-unseen bogeyman picks up the corpse of his parent and tells her “It’s time to go home”.
Reguaws, Kentucky hasn’t changed much over two decades, except now there’s a new gang of thirty-year-old students in the Topshill State College. They’re struggling with the threat of having their Sigma Pi fraternity closed if they can’t come up with 37, 000 dollars in the next couple of weeks. Despite some bemusing moneymaking plans that include car washing (I estimate that they’d have to scrub about 20,000 cars!?), they settle with the idea of a haunted house at the home of the murderous child from the prologue. We all know how much Eddie enjoys attending these occasions, and he doesn’t disappoint when he turns up with a creepy mask and a few tricks up his sleeves…
The second time that I watched Hauntedween for this review; I noted that my opinion had changed ever so slightly as the years have passed by. When rating a small production like this you have to take into account the meagre budget and inexperienced crew, which probably amounted to little more than a few men, a dog and not much else. Hauntedween is as subtly tongue in cheek as the imaginative title would lead you to believe and has the obvious vibe of a good time movie. Now horror/comedies never really click and aside from the decent Blood Hook I can’t really think of any that have gelled well enough to steer away from mediocrity. Then again, Hauntedween manages not to annoy too much, because the humour is not forced and comes across more as a production team that realise that their movie is never going to be anything more than a cheesy slasher and they just want the viewer to join in with the fun that they’re having.There’s plenty of unconvincing accents on display to harmonise with the unmistakable twang of the resident Kentuckians and I think it became something of an in-joke between the cast members and crew.
When the killer starts his rampage, he proves to be a real showman by murdering victims in front of a baying crowd that believe they’re watching a ‘theatrical performance’. Luckily for him he can keep up the act without any fringe of suspicion, because the special effects are as hokey as a Rolex at a boot sale. There’s an ambitious decapitation and half a dozen or so victims that all get their chance to thesp-up their final breath whilst covered with a gallon of corn syrup.
The movie stays true to its slasher heritage and writer/producer/director Doug Robertson was definitely a fan of the genre. Despite the title, it doesn’t mimic Carpenter’s classic as much as you’d think it would and instead tries to spice things up a bit with some slightly different branches to the plot, which I won’t ruin for you.
You can almost feel the enthusiasm of the whole crew streaming out from the cheap plastic video cassette becuase it is that contagious. This blatant and clearly visual evidence that a good time was had by all behind the scenes and on set somewhat lifts Hauntedween above its flaws. I mean, let’s make no mistake about it, this is a shoe-string movie. But it’s one that knows its limitations and makes the most of them. That doesn’t make it worthy of the inflated purchase price that it sells for on VHS, but if you come across it cheap, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t give it a whirl. The final twenty minutes of mayhem are worth seeing for some cheapskate slasher shenanigans. I’m not sure if I am breaking any copyright laws by telling you this, but hey, whilst looking for more info I noticed that it is on YouTube. Sssshhhhh!!
A few buckets of blood, some topless chicks and a masked killer – what can be so bad about that? Take it with a pinch of salt and it might be worth a look…
Killer Guise: √√√
Final Girl √